By 
The following was transcribed from a letter mailed to Octavarius Headquarters. From what we can gather it was written in response to our new writer Logan’s post praising AMC’s new series, The Walking Dead.
I would like to begin by stressing that I am not usually one to pen a response piece. I have, in times of a great emotional peak, written my congressman – and I once wrote a scathing letter to a certain video rental chain – but I don’t want to give the impression that I’m the type of person to get on a proverbial soapbox every time I gain an opinion. However, I found your piece entitled “The Walking Dead: Good Show or Greatest Show” to be too offensive not to speak up. The mere fact that one could sing the praises of a television show such as The Walking Dead (even writing the name makes me cringe) is an outrage to an entire race of people, and I simply must speak up even if others are afraid to do the same.
Firstly, I suppose the polite thing to do would be to introduce myself. My name is Thomas McFadden. I am 36 years old, I am a former pharmacist, and I am an Undead-American.
(This photo was included in the letter we received.)
I, dear sir or madam, am a human being. I shuffle along these abandoned streets just like the rest of you. Much like the protagonist f this abomination of a television program, I have a wife and son. That is, i had a wife and son. Three weeks ago I lost them; they were brutally murdered in front of my own two eyes. I never thought I would ever have to see a bullet put through the heads of my own family, but then again I never thought I’d see a lot of the horrors of the first few months of Earth P.I. (Post-Infection). The proud race of Undead-Americans began with a single child to pass on our lineage, and against all odds we have been thriving better than any could have anticipated. But despite our population’s rapid growth and expansion into many urban areas, the venomous hatred by non-Undead is growing into a more and more obvious presence.
I recently made a weekend trip to Atlanta looking for a new place to live; since I lost my family to a suburban vigilante, I have had no need for a two-bedroom house. I was delighted to see a large group of my kin there! What a weight off of my heavy heart it was to see a burgeoning community of Undead-Americans banding together in such a fashion! But alas, this uplifting feeling did not last long. Out of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of several dozen living humans storming out of a bank which had been previously barred from the inside. (This deliberate act of undead segregation is itself a terrible affront to my people, but as it pales in comparison to what I saw next I will not bother to mention it again.) With guns blazing and machetes drawn, the living proceeded to mow us down with reckless abandon, never once pausing to think about their actions. I could do nothing but stand there and watch as no fewer than thirty of my people fell, helpless and redead in front of the bank entrance. A withdrawal indeed! I haven’t been able to sleep since (or even before) that moment. I only count my lucky stars that I was far enough away from the crossfire not to be considered a threat.
I do not mean to make your day gloomier by recounting the tragedies of one former pharmacist’s afterlife. What I do intend to do is inform you that AMC’s appalling television show is serving to do nothing but destroy us and everything that we stand for. What is a child to think when he sees a show in which a character takes out one of my people with a shovel to the back of the head and smiles? Should we just sit idle without complaint as our people are repeatedly called “geeks” on cable TV? (And I’m sorry if I can’t be complete in my message, but I absolutely refuse to write out the z- word, much less speak it.) Yes, we will eat a horse if there are enough of us to take it down. It is a cultural thing that I do not expect unsophisticated people to fully understand. But it is another thing entirely to portray your main character wincing in disgust, even terror, as we conduct this ritual. As for the graphic depictions of Undead-Americans biting and clawing at the living: we can not deny that there is a grain of truth buried in there. If somebody enters our territory, we will defend it by any means necessary. We will bite, we will claw, we will convert others to our cause, and we will eat our fill of living flesh when presented with the opportunity- just like anybody else.
The Walking Dead has already been renewed for a second season. I’m not naive enough to think that the response letter of one former pharmacist is going to get even the most hate-spewing show taken off the air. To your readers, however: I hope you have the courage to change the channel to stand up for what is right. And to your writers: I hope this piece will make you think twice next time about the programming that you choose to align yourselves with.
LOVING the Fast Food Quest, by the way.
Cordially,
Thomas R. McFadden 
