By Bogue on September 25, 2009

Here in America’s crazy 2 party system, a lot of words get tossed around. Republicans and Democrats have begun to view one another as enemies. Right-wingers will call Democrats lazy hippie drug addicts and left-wingers call Republicans gun-crazy rednecks.

Both sides have their ups and downs, but sometimes I think my left-wing hippie friends and my right-wing gun-loving friends need to realize that they have more in common than they think.

The following is a short multiple choice quiz. Fill in the blank with whichever answer fits best.

1.  “Our country was founded on _____! Our forefathers used them and quite frankly, we should have the right to use it/them today!”

  1. Marijuana
  2. Guns
  3. Either answer works

2.  “Sure, _____ kill people, but only if you’re using them irresponsibly! I mean, I’m always safe about it.”

  1. Drugs
  2. Guns
  3. Either answer works

3.  “I’m not a ______, I just think ______ is/are cool.”

  1. Maniac, guns
  2. Druggie, marijuana
  3. Either answer works

4.  “Of course the crazy ____ shouldn’t be legal. Who really needs anything that extreme? I’m just talking about the normal ones that are fun and safe.”

  1. Guns (Bazookas, rocket launchers, semiautomatic weapons)
  2. Drugs (Heroin, crystal meth, elephant tranquilizers)
  3. Either answer works

5.  “Yeah, well Snoop Dogg got arrested for possession of _____ and he’s cool.”

  1. Marijuana
  2. Guns
  3. Either answer works

6.   “It’s not that unusual. My friend Jim grew up on a farm and he’s been using ____ since he was like, 5.”

  1. Guns
  2. Drugs
  3. Either answer works

7.  “Hey I know where my dad hides his ____. I’ve got a great idea!”

  1. Marijuana
  2. Gun
  3. Either way will probably end badly

8.  “Fuck Tinz. I’m planting a ____ in his car and calling the cops on him. Yeah, that’ll show Tinz.”

  1. Gun
  2. Bag of cocaine
  3. Either way Tinz is totally boned

9.  “Whatever, I drive better when I’m ____.”

  1. A little high
  2. Firing a pistol out the sunroof
  3. Neither are very good ideas

10.  “Most prisoners are in jail for _____ crimes for crying out loud! Let’s stop crowding our prisons and let these people free!”

  1. Nonviolent drug crimes
  2. Violent gun crimes
  3. Wait…um, maybe not the best question for this test

So there you have it.  I know I’ve heard all of these statements before (pretty much).  Take the quiz and see what you end up choosing!  Who knows what your results will be?!

And if you have hard right-wing gun loving friends or extreme left drug-loving friends, have them take the test.  Maybe they’ll find out that they have more in common with their political opponents than they think.

Oh, and don’t be surprised if Tinz is gone for a while.  I hear he’s been going through some weird stuff and driving around alot.  Someone may want to check into that.