By 
Now well all think that we have bad days. Why, yesterday I had to go to work, which makes it a bad day. Some of us get fired, some get stabbed, some get dumped, but none of us have had it as bad as Prince Imhotep.
Just imagine that you are the the High Priest of Osiris (a great gig, nice benefits, company chariot, etc.) and then you accidently misuse your powers to return life to your deceased lover (who wouldn’t!?) and are punished to death by mummification while you are alive (a dick move). Buried alive, you are cursed with the Hom-Dai.
I would die for this broad
Despite his position in life, Imhotep had one secret: the Pharaoh’s mistress Anck-Su-Namun was the love of Imhotep’s life, and so Imhotep wished more than anything else, as did Anck-Su-Namun, to be with her. Okay, yes Imhotep had to sew some wild oats, but we’ve all accidently fondled a Pharaoh’s mistress one time or another. Am I right?
Look, the guy just wanted to get laid. He then gets stabbed and mummified and put under a curse. Can you imagine having blue balls while under the Hom-Dai curse for a couple thousand years!? Ouch!
Now when the woman you love says that only you can resurrect her and then she stabs herself, what’s a guy supposed to do. Sure, they were making sweet Sphinx love at the Pharoah’s gold coast condo. But still, when a woman says that to you, you listen!
Then, you are in some wicked cool temple about to resurrect that woman of your dreams and some Medjai burst in and ruin everything (the most historical of cock blocks).
Can you believe this man was in a film that won an Oscar for Best Picture
A couple thousand years later, you wake up and try to tap your girlfriend’s ass only to have Brendan Fraser ruin everything. BRENDAN FUCKING FRASER! How shitty would you feel after that?
A couple years later, you are resurrected to fight the Scorpion King so you can finally tap Anck-Su-Namu’s ass. But guess what? Fucking Encino Man saves the day.
So, the next time you miss your train/bus by 30 seconds, get mugged by a
Poor guy.
smelly man, or are living in a recession, think about Prince Imhotep looking like this and you will be fine.
