A Sexy Disney Update for The Ladies

After my last article (very popular), a very large portion of my female reader base were outraged and upset. I got a flood of comments from ladies insisting that Peter Pan is sexy. We need to clear this up.

Everyone stop right now because we need to do a thought experiment. Close your eyes, open a door, walk into a room and introduce yourself to Peter Pan. Play out the first few minutes of this encounter in your head. You’ll know when to stop because my point will have been made.

Peter Pan is a self-centered D-bag. He just runs around being Ignorant and Arrogant and he doesn’t care what problems he causes for you or anyone else. Ladies, you really don’t find this sexy. You’re never sitting there thinking dirty thoughts about the loud obnoxious guy whose circle of awareness rarely exceeds a few inches from his body. This doesn’t happen. Trust me. Think about it.

I don’t want to be an ass about this so I offer you all a compromise. We’ll get the 2 most popular characters off that list in one sly maneuver.

We’ll just take Joe’s winning personality…