Last weekend, while testing the bar in our new apartment, I asked my roommates, “Hey, do you guys think it’d taste good if I made a pizza drink?”
They all said, “No!” They said, “No” so emphatically that I decided to waste my last slice of Gino’s East deep dish pizza on this stupid, stupid experiment in mixology.
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Can you spot the pepperoni?
Ingredients
- 1 slice fancy deep dish pizza
- 3 oz cheap vodka hat tastes like clown spittle
- No shame
Recipe
- Remove crust from pizza slice
- Heat pizza until moist if not already
- Place pizza in food processor for one minute, or until finely ground
- Pour pizza grains into blender
- Pour vodka into blender
- Begin slow blend, increasing blending speed every few seconds
- Pause for reflection while blending continues
- Stop blending when pizza and vodka are fully mixed
- Drink
- Regret this decision
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The Aftermath
I made the unfortunate mistake of not heating the pizza before processing and blending, so the two ingredients never truly combined. This left the finished Pizza-tini with small grains of pizza floating in a puke colored vodka sauce.
I made it about half way through this drink before admitting defeat. Only one of my roommates, Tinz, was brave enough to try the Pizza-tini, and for that I salute him.
If anyone knows of a better way to make this drink, please let me know.